Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
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