I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
