East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
NoShamevember. You game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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