I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
How does it feel to date your dad?
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
