We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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