And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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