guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
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