my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
