super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Randomize
