You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
