you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
