doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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