All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD