Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
