hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
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