so let's talk penis.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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