I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
There are leaves in my underwear?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize