After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
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