The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize