I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
