if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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