And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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