You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
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