More tranny stories later!
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Randomize
