One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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