My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts