Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize