Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
