I can text with my tongue
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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