somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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