There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
