it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
