It's just like the Real World with babies
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
