I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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