i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Randomize
