so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
