Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
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Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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