I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
