Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
