I can tuck mytits in my pants
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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