Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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