You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Randomize