please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
