one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize