When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
He? As in you personified your dick?
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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