two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
You are a booty call, not a friend.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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