office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
