my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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