Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
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