so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
