last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
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I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
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My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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