Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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